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what a load of hogwash

It was with some trepidation that I approached my mornings filming in my cousin's manor house, after all as an international superstar, one can never be too carefull about what one links ones name to.
However I followed my gut instinct and agreed, but as Grayson, my driver, battled his way through the torrential rain, floods and wind, for the first time in my life I felt a pang of self doubt. But I did want a unique experience after all!
I am always dlighted to spend time in my cousin Gemmina's quiant little home, which she insists in callinga 'manor house', although compared to my own lyxurious sty really is merely a glorified chicken coup.
After a safe arrival I was introduced to my minions and film crew for the day, who seemed very civil, even if a little tired, and pale looking, they must have been working hard! My crew had the nickname of 'The fruitcakes', but to be honest they seemed a little stale, which I later learned was due to working until 2 am! what a committed crew, but I remember a time that I was myself a novice, and for one particularly career enhancing project, I even sacrificed my daily manicure.
However as I have now reached a global megastar status, I felt I very generously gave half a day of my time for this production, as it was a worthy cause.
My role for the day, was suprisingly pleasant, and worthy of my status, I was given my own TV show, how wonderfull! Infact I am currently in talks to replace Parkinson with my own prime time show, so this worked out as a nice little warm up.
Anyway, I don't want to wallow in my own success, as i lknow many of you reading this are wanabees, reading this in the hope that a little bit of the magic stars such as myself posses can rub off onto you through reading this. I am sorry to dissapoint those of you that hold this unrealistic view, but will impart some wisdom to you, that being 'You have either got it or you haven't', and as my cameo in the restrictive short will show, I certainly have.